Thursday, April 8, 2010

Seriously, Heidi?

Okay, to say that I have been disappointed in my maternity clothes options this pregnancy would be a complete understatement. Apparently 'tent' is back in, the empire waste that billows open at the bottom. Sure, you can find a few cute things, especially if you are willing to pay out the behind for them....otherwise, it is seriously tough pickin's out there.

I have been stalking Gap and Old Navy (more in my price range) and have been sorely disappointed. What I WANT are normal looking shirts. Cute t-shirts that fit OVER the belly, and come back in at the bottom. Ruched on the side is acceptable. I have barely found anything, though. Either they are the dreaded empire tent, or else they have unflattering t-shirt sleeves, or else they are scoop necked. Um, apparently the so-called 'maternity' models don't gain any extra padding in their chest areas. Seriously, we are looking at 'a' cups, people. I highly doubt there is a preggo out there who can wear a scoop neck and not feel like a prostitute.

ANYWAY.

My sister has been helping me with my maternity dilemma. Enter Heidi Klum. Thank you, Heidi, for designing more hideous maternity options for those of us who already feel like we belong on a dairy farm amongst the cattle. Our favorite option???


Hold on to your seat.....





Wait for it.......





You are not ready.....






Seriously, Heidi?


20 comments:

erin and shaun said...

W-O-W!!! This is an outfit suggestion? Not an undergarment? Hmmm...I bet you could rock it! :)

Brooke said...

Yes! I concur! I went to Motherhood Maternity for this very reason, to check out her line.. I was so pumped! Um... came out empty handed.. lame, lame!!

MT said...

ha ha, you are so funny. that image is seriously disturbing. yuck-o. i bet you look cuter in a tent than you think, though ;)

Nancy said...

Come on Joy, you would look hot in that it's kind of like when Sandra Dee gets cool and pregnant in Grease, you remember that scene don't you?

Melissa said...

wow! yes, that is....interesting! I would have looked like a huge whale in that when I was pg and 230 lbs!!

Eric and Katie said...

W-O-W that is all i have to say. Maybe it would work if you were moonlighting as a pregnant super-hero. You just need a mask!

The Peach.... said...

UM. Um......

What I can't believe is the SHOES. WHAT PREGNANT WOMAN wears shoes like that unless she wants to end up in the hospital? Seriously? Heidi?????

And I know, when I was researching this for you, I seriously could NOT stop laughing.....obviously Heidi doesn't gain any weight when she's prego.......she doesn't get swollen either.

Heidi Klum. Seriously.

The Peach.... said...

Joy, do you see a business in our future? Maybe NORMAL maternity clothes? Made for normal moms? Not hideous.

www.notyourhideousmaternity.com

The Peach.... said...

I think I need to blog about this, too....stay tuned.

The Peach.... said...

Blogged it. Furious.

Mike and Tiffanee said...

I'm not a fan of the maternity clothes out there either. And that outfit is awful! I have just bought me the Bella Band so I can still wear some of my regular pants and I just went to Downeast to get some shirts, they fit tighter but are nice and long.

Jean Smith said...

laughing my HEAD off right now! shut up and go get yourself a flattering, stylish one piece outfit...in yellow.

Candi said...

What's so wrong about it? The necklace and stripper shoes totally make it work! ;)
PS: I have TONS of 'normal' stuff sitting in storage if you wanna use it!

Weston and Nicole said...

That made me laugh!! You are so funny. Agreed though.

Annie G. said...

I don't see what you are complaining about here...I mean honestly! That is exactly what I want to wear this pregnancy. I think I might look totally hot (insert sarcasm)!

Lindsey said...

That's disgusting! I bought a few shirts from lilac maternity. I've really liked them but they are pricey so I got them on babysteals.com. They're meant to wear before, during and after and I think you really could. My mom also found one on clearnace at expected by fort union and sent it. Good luck though! Maternity clothes were really cute until I was pregnant I swear! Like remember when target had all those cute ones last summer? Yeah, not so much.

Bobbi Leavitt said...

wait. are we talking about the shoes here?? who wears those when your pregnant? and look at that outfit! ;)

Amanda, Jared and Camden said...

I totally agree Joy! I saw a bunch of heidi's stuff and was not impressed! I am having a really hard time finding maternity cloths too :( I went to target and bought some of their boy friend t's and they are perfect, They are long and cover the belly and they are stretchy so i can wear them the whole pregnancy. Plus they are light weight so they will be nice in the summer. They are really cute and flattering(they have a v neck) I dont feel super huge in them. Let me know if you find anything else thats cute and cheap. :)

Amanda, Jared and Camden said...

SO i guess target calls the t's i was talking about mossimo pocket t's. They come in every color

茂珊茂珊 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.